I need a separation from all of my stuff but I cannot get myself to leave this unhealthy relationship. As I write this I am sitting in my basement where most of our junk is stored. It is an effing mess but I can see the freedom at the end of the tunnel. I can imagine how clean and free I would feel to be rid of all the extra. But when I choose a specific item to get rid of my brain starts manufacturing reasons to keep it. When I can force myself to get rid of something, I go through a mental wrestling match. Am I addicted to my stuff?
Sometimes I feel I am being too drastic in eliminating so much, but logically I know I am not. I am worried that I might want something back.
Sometimes I fear that I might need something that I have thrown out. For instance, if I get rid of the extra mixing bowls, I might have a more difficult time cooking some things.
How can I focus on the freedom while I am struggling through this elimination process? How can I let go? I wonder if other people are as attached as I am. Why am I so attached?
Maybe just I need a tornado to get rid of it.
Some of the other reasons I am averse to simply throwing the stuff out:
- I feel like it is a waste to throw perfectly good items away
- I don’t want to get rid of something I might need in the future requiring me to re-buy it while feeling pretty stupid.
- I would prefer to sell rather than donate to get some of the money I spent back. I hate wasting money.
- I have trouble letting go and with the feeling of “mine”. I am too attached.